Guns Open Up
Fortunately for us Tories, the enemy trenches can't wait and are opening up well ahead of zero hour. Maybe we'll find out how well Lt Cameron holds up before we actually have to go over the top.
Ali "Big Bertha" Campbell has loosed off one salvo:
'It has been said that David Cameron is the new Tony Blair. But watching Mr Cameron trying to soundbite his way through the debate, it was clear that Mr Cameron is not remotely in Mr Blair’s league. Far from being the new Blair, he may actually be the new Alastair Campbell.
He knows how to craft a line and put it over. He has a feel for what tickles the media’s fancy, what makes a story and how to get it up as a headline, what combination of action and demeanour keeps the photographers happy. He knows how to take a line of attack against him and turn it into a line of attack against his attackers. These are skills all press officers deploy from time to time. And every leader in the media age needs this kind of professional support...
From what I’ve seen of Mr Cameron I would put PR and presentation skills top of a fairly short list.
Someone canvassed after the first of the Tory hustings said that the two contenders would make a great dream ticket. Perhaps that should be Davis as leader and Cameron as his spin doctor.'
Ah yes, say DC supporters, that's Ali von Hindenburg, so what would you expect?
But further down the line, Michael Crick took a pop on last night's Newsnight. He picked up DC's about-turn on binge drinking. As we know, Cameron got into a spot of bother over his directorship at Tiger Tiger company Urbium Plc. Crick now reveals that some of Urbium's London bars have unenviable police form on drunkanddisorderliness, and he contrasted this with DC's newfound concern for "responsibilty". He also gleefully reminded us of some earlier Cameron pronouncements strongly in favour of 24 hour drinking.
And even DC fan Nick Robinson couldn't stop himself having a go on yesterday's BBC News profile, interrupting the very first interview answer to point out it was just another Cameron soundbite.
Tonight, the Lieutenant will be tied to a stake in front of the Paxo firing party. We should find out if that silver cigarette case really can deflect bullets.